The last few days have been non-eventful, but interesting. Trying to get my body to act like it is twenty-five was futile and am paying for it now. For the past few weeks change has been circling in and out of my thoughts.
Over recent days I have been trying to do as much as possible to keep my thoughts off these medical test and pending results. Like I told my sons, I’ll probably just require medication for a while to correct and I believe that. My greatest concern at this moment would have to be my knees. I want to have better mobility and it would be wonderful to have a day without pain. Truth is I don’t want to be cut open anymore.
Then I have to consider it may help me, but there are so many other fear factors. Anyway, I’ve gone Way off topic. I want to talk about change. One thing I noticed in my conversations with friends is everyone is stuck somewhere and most are comfortable. So comfortable, it is the main topic of every discussion.
It seems like for a lot of us the past has a stronger influence on how we conduct ourselves than living in the current time frame. It occurred to me that if a specific moment of my life has me so bound, no matter how many books I read or times I talk about those life events things have changed and the best thing for me to do is get with the program.
It’s not an easy thing to do, but really I wanted to challenge myself to try something different for a change. I want to fast from dwelling on anything that is older than the last thirty days. It has already been firmly established there have been life events which have scarred and maimed me. So, if all I talk about, let me soften it, share it as testimony or words of encouragement for someone else what further damage am I heaping back into my own spirit.
It seems to me there is a verse which says to think on whatsoever is good, lovely, etc., but the only way I can help someone is to continue to regurgitate all my pain; then where is the good in that? It seems like the best way to help is offer real sincere words of encouragement to the speaker and the hearer. Think about every message/parable Jesus shared wasn’t one of how he was victorious over some set-back in his life. He shared what would snap the listener out of their dismal circumstances into words of substance and hope.
Also how am I being diligent with the word, if I’m taking the time to read and study like I claim, then why haven’t I been able to integrate Philippians 2 into how I go about spreading the message. Peter was imprisoned, yet the book of Philippians is not full of the woes and lacking he was experiencing, but all about how Jesus instructed and came for a particular purpose.
In my challenge I want to be more careful of what I talk about and how I share successfully the hurts and not rebirth the hurts of my past. I always say I want to experience the goodness of God on a daily basis, but if I am rehashing all the things my parents did wrong or the men and women whom I allowed to break my heart, when does the goodness come in?
So starting immediately I want to temper my conversations with family and friends to be different. I hope friends will be patient with me when I ask them to change the topic or end any conversations. I want to be able to apply the things I read and learn from all the resources I spend my time reading, listening to and studying.
It’s like I heard someone tell me long ago, “Sent the child to school and they ate all the books”. It seems like the more I study the more I am taken back to dealing with the fruit of our lips. Basically we either become spewers of bitter fruit or seed bearing fruit. Jesus called the crowd together again and said, "Listen now, all of you––take this to heart. It made me look and understand Mark 7:14-23 with a whole new thought process.
“Jesus called the crowd together again and said, "Listen now, all of you––take this to heart. It's not what you swallow that pollutes your life; it's what you vomit––that's the real pollution." When he was back home after being with the crowd, his disciples said, "We don't get it. Put it in plain language." Jesus said, "Are you being willfully stupid? Don't you see that what you swallow can't contaminate you? It doesn't enter your heart but your stomach, works its way through the intestines, and is finally flushed." (That took care of dietary quibbling; Jesus was saying that all foods are fit to eat.) He went on: "It's what comes out of a person that pollutes: obscenities, lusts, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, depravity, deceptive dealings, carousing, mean looks, slander, arrogance, foolishness–– all these are vomit from the heart. There is the source of your pollution."
So no longer will it be part of my speak to share all the hurts, rather instead what it took to come unstuck from that which I bound myself up with my own speech. To share how I’ve endured the hurts rather than relive the hurts. What I get from this bit of scripture is this; the trials and hurts experienced affect us when they occur, but it is the speaking them over and over again that is causing emotional damage after the fact. I had a hard enough time cleaning it up when my children were sick. I personally have a rough time with vomiting when there is an intestinal discomfort , so I definitely am not the type to go back to vomit.
Accept this challenge, if you dare….this is all I have to share. Wonderful Wednesday. Smooches~~
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